how to raise perfect children

The other day I posted the following on my facebook page:

you know mama's serious 'bout things when she busts out the parenting books and begins a Word Document with the OFFICIAL FAMILY RULES....
watch out kids!

I kid you not, there is nothing like summer vacation to show you what is lacking in your parenting skills.

And summer vacation has shown me that I will not survive another 2 months (or 18 years) until I begin to show a little more consistency.

I realized, as with anything important in life, I needed to come up with a plan for success.
An IN MA FACE plan I would stick with.
{yes, I realize you with teenagers are laughing at me right now, but go with me here.  what is life without hope?  even if it IS misguided!}

Now, I am AWESOME at implementing ideas and actions...for mmmm, about two weeks, and then somehow we (gotta give Jimmy some of that blame!) begin to slack...let things slide...and then suddenly we're surrounded by what feels like chaos.

This time, Mama is SERIOUS.

So after pouring over my favorite parenting books (click here for those) and taking all my underlined and highlighted notes to a word document, 

I finally came up with the Official (able to be tweaked as needed) Family Rules.

And because I was asked to blog this by one of my most favorite people ever....

I now present.....

What I'm sure will soon be made into a book.
And then perhaps an after school tv special...
because they are just that powerful...
totally able to transform any child/family alive....
{according to the books...}

dum da da dum....

The Official Family Rules:

The Three R’s

Respect

~ Say Yes Mom/Dad when asked to do something or when given an answer

~ Say Excuse Me and wait patiently when adults are talking, do not interrupt

~ Always say Please & Thank You

~ Understand that our yes means yes and no means no....it does not mean maybe, so don't push or there will be consequences.

~ Respect the home of the family, and have your tantrums/bad moods in your room.  

You may return to the family when you are ready to show self control.

~ Always use a soft and gentle tone.  

No yelling or raised voices.  

This does not show love, respect, or self control.

Responsibility

~ be accountable for your own actions, and be ready to accept responsibility for them

~ carry out tasks given by those in charge, immediately when asked

~ think carefully when making a decision, because you will have to stick with it once it's made

~ no tattling, you must work your problems out together

Resourcefulness

~ You must have a hang in there, tough it out, and try it again attitude

~ Always try to do things on your own with your BEST efforts before asking for help

*for mom & dad:

referees rules ~ No Threats, No Second Chances, No Deals

Let your Yes be Yes, and your No be No

Daily Checklist:

Bible Time ~ Read devotions and/or a bible story as a family

Family Prayer Time ~ Pray for your every need, open and honest

Chores ~ Each family member is responsible for taking care of all that God has blessed us with, and we must each do our part to show we can be trusted with those blessings.  
Your assigned chores should be done every day before bed.


~~~~~~~


Now go little grasshopper....and raise perfect children.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

get ready for battle

Sometimes there comes a moment where enough is enough.

You just cannot slump around anymore.

You will not whine or complain or mope one more minute.

There MUST be an end, and you will find that end no matter what it takes.

There also comes a time when you finally realize that a pill or a book or a person or a purchase is not going to fix you.

In fact, deep down you know that nothing out there will ever be able to fix or complete you.

And you'll come to know...it's only up to you.

And so you pick yourself up and you just. get. ready.

Ready to battle.

Ready to take responsibility and ready to make changes.

You stand before the mirror, and you acknowledge that only you see what's before you....
what is inside you....
and only you can make the next step.

You may not feel ready.

You may not feel equipped.

But know that He is, and He is in you....ready to tackle it by your side.

He is just waiting, has always been patiently waiting, for you to make that first step.

And the time is now.

Take His hand and take the leap.

It's time to fight, and grow, and learn, and take responsibility.

It's time to DO THE WORK.

And do it daily. 

Hourly.

Even minute by minute in the moments you must.

For we will ALL be stronger and wiser and happier simply because we refused to give up.

We wouldn't give in.

And we will know we fought for ourselves, for our life, for our family, for our soul.

So, make a list, write a letter, be accountable, laugh.  

Every day laugh....

But most importantly, whatever it may be...

BEGIN TO MAKE A CHANGE.

And never stop fighting.

Never give up.
We are not quitters.

He thought us worthy to live,

so begin today to live a life that is worthy.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

my next tattoo

There is a passage that I have always loved and totally cling to when times are hard....

I love it so much in fact, that it's in process of being turned into a sketch for my next tattoo.

{first & second}

It's amazingly powerful, and so incredibly accurate in what we must do to survive the waves of life...

that I couldn't resist sharing.

~~~~~~~

You wonder what to do when you feel attacked on all sides by seemingly irresistible forces, waves that cover you and want to sweep you off your feet. 

Sometimes these waves consist of feeling rejected, feeling forgotten, feeling misunderstood. 

Sometimes they consist of anger, resentment, or even the desire for revenge, and sometimes of self-pity and self rejection. 

These waves make you feel like a powerless child abandoned by your parents.

What are you to do? 

Make the conscious choice to move the attention of your anxious heart away from these waves and direct it to the One who walks on them and says, 'It's me. Don’t be afraid' (Matthew 14:27; Mark 6:50; John 6:20). 

Keep turning your eyes to him and go on trusting that he will bring peace to your heart. 

Look at him and say, 'Lord, have mercy'. 

Say it again and again, not anxiously but with confidence that he is very dose to you and will put your soul to rest.

~Henry J.M. Nouwen

~~~~~~~

Take THAT into your weekend!!!

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

if you thought jimmy could dance...

By now, I hope that you all have had a chance to get familiar with my YouTube channel (and this one here).

But, most specifically (for todays purposes) we're talking about the video we like to call, 

"Jimmy's Dancing."

Of course we use the term "dancing" loosely.

You're about to see why.

{there's a shirtless edition too...}

And yes, he's booked for parties for the next two years, so get in line.

{mama's got 'em too}

Well now....it looks as though his talent has been officially passed on to my firstborn.

Take a look:

And to think it all started here with shakin' his booty & raisin' da roof:

I am such a proud mama & wife.

{btw, to be clear, I am not in ANY way mocking Taylor.  I think he's ABSOLUTELY adorable, and I love his moves.  I mean, obviously he gets his talent from me...being that I am a professional at the Tracy Anderson School of Professional Dance in Le Living Room every day.}
  {I am, though, to be clear.... 100% mocking Jimmy.  In love.  It's all in love.}

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

dear dear diary, i wanna tell my secrets....

I'm a journal writer.

And I adore it.

More than I adore blogging, if you can believe it.

Here I'm honest, yes.

But there?

It's soul baring.

There are no backspaces, or cross outs, or do overs.

It's my heart exposed, good & bad, and it is me.

This last week wasn't my best.

I wasn't the happiest or the brightest or the most optimistic.

I might've snapped too quickly, spoke too loudly, judged (myself mostly) too harshly.

And so I took to the pages of my journal, as I knew it was time for some brutal honesty.

All it took was a few lines of putting my heart to words, and I discovered the issue....

and with just a few more I discovered the steps to move forward.

Sometimes, when I write that way, I feel it's how God speaks to me.

It's how He brings me back to Him.

And often when I finish spilling the words, I take some time to go back and learn from the past.

I flip through the months of pages and find a time where it was better, the same, different, or harder...

and rediscover something that time had somehow already stolen from me.

Suddenly it becomes new again and when my heart feels at rest and I'm able to breathe deeper...

I close the book...

close my eyes...

and remember that tomorrow is a new day with new hope.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

an unconditional love...

Every Fathers Day my heart celebrates the memories of my dad who absolutely knew what it meant to show unconditional love for his four girls.

He wasn't perfect.

But who is?

What was perfect, was the way he never let us go.  

We were in his heart until the day he died.

And there isn't a day that doesn't go by that I don't selfishly wish with all my heart that he was still with me today....

able to parent, able to grandparent....able to love.

I miss you Dad, so much it aches at times.

But I know, I know in my heart that when I met Jimmy just a month later....that my dad had to have had a hand in it.

{he must have put in a good word to God}

And now my kids get to experience the same kind of amazing unconditional love from him that I always had from mine.

{walking in unconditional love, it's the only way}

And it's funny and amazing how God works...

Because it's been a rough few years for me, feeling lost without parents....

Watching others who have them, and feeling my heart heavy with a longing...

And then more than 3 years ago we met Greg....

Who we refer to as our "Dad from God."

{and i know we're not the only ones!}

He has been incredibly loving, wise, always there to listen and guide us....

and once again...

in the true spirit of a father...

He has always freely given us an unconditional love.

So, to all three of these men....

I give my heart.

My own unconditional love.

Happy Fathers Day.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

shop my closet is up!

I just spent the weekend (or rather, day) cleaning out my closet.  It was time to edit, edit, edit....

Just head on over to the Shop My Closet/Library link, and have at it.

First come first serve, just send me an email and let me know what you want....or if you have questions or want more pictures. =)

Shipping is $5.

I will delete the items once they are sold.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

what i wore out & hair do i did

jacket: f21

top:  heart moon star, consignment shop in AZ
tank:  mossimo, target
jeans:  jolt, consignment store (these are by far my favorite brand of jeans!!!)
 wedge shoes:  jessica simpson, consignment shop in AZ
bangles:  f21
ring: f21
necklace:  thrifted (LOVE!)  I want to sleep in this thing.  So fun.
hair do i did:  curled loosely (tutorial here) and then a double knot ponytail (seen how to do here)
occasion:  church

~~~~~~~

Hope you guys have a lovely weekend!!!
I'll be at the beach watching Jimmy teach Taylor to surf....SO EXCITED!

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

if you thought deer heads were cool...

....wait till you see this flamingo head!

Kind of amazing, right?

When my sweet crafty friend Gilly, (or she simply answers to "sweet crafty friend"), showed me this link, I knew it had to be mine.

The problem is though, when it comes to crafting, I need her to be present in my house in order for it to ACTUALLY happen.

Today was that day.
And oh what a happy day it was.

That little gal just has a way about her that absolutely makes me smile.
I mean, she just totally makes ma heart happy.
{i'm talking about the flamingo here....through Gilly has the same effect on me as well}

So, I basically followed the rules from the tutorial, except that I used a boa (from Michaels, $2) and wrapped that around instead of doing all that sewing.

I can be crafty, but not THAT crafty.

She was the perfect addition to the "kids wing" of the house.  

I think combined with their art gallery, and hand print canvas'...
Ma Fa-mingo (as Chloe calls him) most definitely completes it all.

Love.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

why we don't have a family picture...

...and there's about four more just like these....

One of these days, my family will learn to love the camera. 

One of these days....

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

what i wore out

top: joie, found at a consignment shop...very blousy, and when the wind blows it billows out making me appear quite pregnant.  but, still, i love.
jacket:  apple bottom jeans, platos closet
jeans:  sevens, found at a consignment shop as well
wedges:  madeline stuart, thrifted
animal print earrings:  platos closet
sunnies:  f21
event: taylors first piano recital!!!

I think this entire outfit was probably no more than $50, accessories included.
Forget Extreme Couponing, put me on Extreme Thrifting!
Now that's the reality show I wanna be on. 

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

what are you holding onto?

saying goodbye is never easy.

but sometimes it's necessary.

we all have thoughts, things, people, places...

that keep us in a place we weren't meant to stay in.

they may have served their time,

their purpose,

but it's time or purpose is no longer.

and while your heart, mind, and soul may long for that very comfort,

you must find a way to say goodbye.

and sometimes you have to say it again and again...

but say it, you must.

i've never been good at letting go.

when my heart latches, it holds.

but i know God's plan is bigger and better than what i grasp here in my heart, head, and hands.

and when i finally loosen my grip and let go....

there is always incredible freedom beyond.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

hair do i did

So, here we have a hair do I did over the weekend.  

And believe it or not, it takes just seconds!

(okay, maybe minutes...but only a couple.)

Mostly I followed my girl Tiffany's tutorial (see below), but skipped a step or two.

Like the backcombing.

And the curling.

And then instead of using bobby pins, I used my twisty thing from Target. 

Also, I kinda french twisted rather than just twisted.

But you get the idea...

Anyway, you should definitely check out Tiffany...

She has THE BEST of the best ideas when it comes to cute hair do's.

And, with it being summer time and all, these are definitely some great quick and easy styles to take to the beach.

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"

hope for your weary soul

All I can say is that I am ever so thankful for my relationship with the Lord, because these last few months have been full of challenges and struggles.
And in those moments (and there were plenty) that I felt I just couldn't deal anymore....I prayed for His strength to replace mine, and it always did.

When I gave up "my comfort zone" for this little experiment, I had in my mind three months.
From all that I read, and from all I talked to, it seemed 3 months was the turning point for most.
And yet, nearly every week, it felt like 3 months seemed an eternity to get through, and all I wanted to do was throw in the towel and go back.

But, I didn't.
Because I had hope.
I had Him.

I still had (and continue to have) to work, though.
Constantly I did all I could to find a smile.
I worked and prayed for all the inner joy I could find...
and most of the time, it worked.

{what we must do for the children in our life....}

But there were times at the end of the day that I was just tired.

Tired of fighting it.

Tired of the battle.

And I would find comforting release in the warm tears that trickled down my cheeks.

At the end of this week it will be three months.

And what do you know, I've had an entire week where it hasn't been work.

A week where I've been able to see the bright side easily...

A week where I haven't felt the need to release through my tears...

A week of hope.


{happy feels ahhh.mazing}

And that's the "takeaway...."
What we need to remember when we go through our hard times.

That there is Hope.

You're not alone.

There IS an end.
Or at least, there will be breaks.

Most importantly, there IS a lesson.

And there, as I always quote, will be beauty from pain.

I can't say I'll never feel the heaviness of life again.
I can't say that anxiety is a thing of the past.
But I can say now, without a shadow of a doubt, that I can and will get through it by clinging to My Hope.

I just needed to be clear...
with all my "mood cure" talk and posts.

That the hope I have is not because of diet, or exercise, medication (or lack of), or even amazing supplements...
The hope I have is because I have placed my life forever in God's hands.
And because of that, my weary soul can rest.

I so encourage you to do the same....

© 2011 "Le Musings of Moi"